So we made it through Christmas only slightly scathed, and I realize I’ve also been trashing New York New Years right and left. I guess the question on everyone’s mind is ‘Well Model Behavior, since you’ve trash talked every end of the year activity known to man, what are you doing for New Years?”

Answer: I blasting out of this city like Buzz Light Year and flying down south. Way south. Think equator.

I’m going to a mythical adult play land in Uruguay called Punta del Este.

Never heard of it?

Neither had I until some irresponsible, partying, miscreant of a playboy planted the idea of going to Punta del Este for New Years in my head two years ago. He painted me a ridiculously vivid picture of endless beaches, a classier Mykonos on steroids, horses, polo, golf, fashion shows, breakfast on sea side cafés watching the sun rise, and clubbing till dawn, while still reminding me that the “real” parties took place in private mega-mansions that the hosts had spent eleven of the past twelve months preparing for. He described security, endless barbeques, five hundred person lawn parties, all conceived by Brazil and Argentina’s elite.

The Punta trip has been a dirty secret of mine ever since this encounter. This year, it’s actually happening.

According to about.com, my guy’s word picture wasn’t too far off:

Punta del Este, Uruguay is called the St. Tropez of Uruguay for its miles of beautiful, pristine beaches, its upscale and exclusive resort tradition, famed nightlife, and the wealth of its summer visitors. For decades Punta del Este was an exclusive resort for wealthy South Americans, and it is still expensive, but not as much as famed European and US resort areas. Punta del Este offers a relaxed life style. It is geared to vacationers who get a late morning start. Hotel dining rooms and services may be open before noon, but the rest of the city may not be. Dinners are late, at 10 PM or later, and discos go until dawn, allowing revelers to see both the sun rise and set over water. The Cipriani Lido at the Cipriani Punta del Este Resort in La Barra is one of the hottest spots in town.

See? You can never escape Giuseppe Cipriani, not even down by the equator. According to my sources, Giuseppe frolics around on his boat in Punta every year. I’ll try to avoid him, which shouldn’t be too difficult since there’s a frightening amount of social activities going on. I was recently copied on what appears to be a Punta partier’s Bible, a mass email called ‘The Agenda.’ ‘The Agenda’s’ so spectacularly long that I took my beloved iPhone three downloads to ingest it. ‘The Agenda’ is a piece of work so detailed and so organized that I remained in awe of it – like I should give it some bound cover and place it in a unique mahogany stand with lapis. This is a powerful document one feels they should pray to.

To let you in on the kind of stuff we’re talking about, I’m providing an excerpt of ‘The Agenda’ here:

Dec 26: Beach - Opening Personal Beach , Playa Brava de José Ignacio.
Dec 26: Beach - Opening Playa Movistar en Montoya Beach.
Dec 26: Golf - Copa Tudor - Brela en Cantegrill Country Club.
Dec 26: Event - Fashion Show of Oscar Alvarez at Club del Lago Hotel - Contact: María Shaw Difusión -094416366 - .
Dec 26: Opening Kandy Bar La Barra - Opens from 9 am to 5 am - Breakfast, lunch, dinner and disco, by Hotel Montoya. Contact: Diego Velázquez

Exhausted yet? Keep in mind we just covered 1 of the 18 days listed in 'The Agenda.'

Impressive, right?

I happen to know the genius who created this masterful organizational compilation is a woman, and I plan on making out with her in gratitude the first chance I get.

So my bags are packed, and if that schedule serves as any hint, I’m going to be a pretty busy girl. Don’t worry as I’ll be recording all the juicy gossip in my journal as I’ve made an executive decision to leave both my iPhone and my laptop locked up in my New York desk drawer. It’s kinda of like a New York girl’s version of “Into the Wild,” although I do plan on purchasing a Uruguayan disposable phone and trying to score some local numbers. I’ll throw a flare or two in my Fendi in case I get stranded or things get really rocky. I don’t speak Spanish, and have never been farther South than San Diego. Worried? Nah. I’m fearless. Bring on the bison, barbeques and Latin American princes. Anyone who’d like me to find them a husband feel free to post your specifications in my comment box.

So while I won’t be officially blogging until my return in mid-January, Model Behavior is NOT shutting down. I’ve planned all sorts of surprise entertainment to amuse you’ll while I’m off sunning next to a turquoise sea with two Latin body builders simultaneously massaging my spine – that’s the kind of nice person I am. So be back looking for updates and check out the archives…and please, have a crappy happy New Year. I’ll be thinking of you all!