Last post on the topic of feminity, I swear. Some of the gems in here were too good to pass up. Let WikiHow teach you, and observe my commentary interspersed in pink.

How to be Feminine:

STEPS

1. Take care of your hair and make sure it smells good. It's okay if your hair is slightly frizzy or imperfect, as long as it is not stringy and/or greasy. Also, try to keep your hair out of your face.

2. Wear only as much makeup as you need. Always have powder handy wherever you go. Wow, I actually do this already! Keep make-up minimal. You decide how much, but too much isn't very attractive. Many may view you as insecure and in reality not very beautiful if you wear too much to cover up. Good point! If you use more then 10 minutes in front of the mirror, you should think about toning it down. Just 10 minutes? Is that a joke? Is that for just make up application or for make up application and outfit coordination? Because anything less than twenty minutes for clothing determination is whack!

3. Wear neat but conservative clothes. Really short skirts come across as slutty, not feminine. Slutty. Feminine. Are different. Check.

4. Don't be loud and obnoxious. This is a male trait and people believe you to be more masculine than you actually are. Must practice talking daintily. Is it feminine to glare at people who are being loud? Or to give them a bitchy raised eyebrow? Probably not.

5. Don't fish for compliments. Fishing is also a male trait. Like…with galoshes in lakes?...wait, I’m confused. Remember, you are a woman. I often wake up and ask my roommate, ‘wait, what gender am I again?’ Be confident even if you aren't completely happy with yourself. That's called alcohol.

6. Be happy with yourself. Accept your body for what it is and others will love you. Sweet.

7. Remove unattractive body hair. Wax your upper lip if necessary and tweeze your eyebrows. Shave your legs (all of them) all three of them?, arms, and back (if it needs it) If you need to shave your back maybe you need to double check if you’re a woman. Hair is disgusting.

8. Be confident and happy. Nothing is more beautiful than a smiling woman. Just keep your lips together, if you don't like your teeth. God bless orthodontia.

9. Try not to use profanities. We all do it, but if you could make a sailor blush with your mouth and not your looks, you should think about toning it down. This is actually pretty valid. I’ve had guys express displeasure when I swear excessively.

10. Be aware of your posture. Chin up high, back straight and thoughts positive.

11. Be smart. Easier said then done. Most people like smart women who are able to have a discussion about something. Really!?!? Don't make yourself dumb. But also don't be a know-it-all. Accept if a man is right, especially if you like him.

TIPS

Follow these steps, but don't try to be someone you're not! Unless you are hairy, in which case you should probably change a little. Laughing. So. Hard.

If you have talents such as ballet, cheerleading, cooking rice, etc., try and make it known without bragging. Cooking rice?

Shower daily, wash your face twice a day, brush and floss your teeth twice a day, and use deodorant! Really? I have to floss to get my femininity degree?

Be organized and neat with your things. This is a feminine trait (have you noticed that all men are sloppy?) Having a pigsty of a dorm/apartment/house has never been girly. Even if it’s thongs and lingerie that’s messily spread everywhere?

Confidence isn't about using a bold tone of voice or always appearing happy and solid. To be genuine, confidence must be about knowing yourself really well and being brave enough to be yourself in public without being pushy, defensive, or embarrassed. It takes a long time. But stick in there, girlfriend. Thanks! Girlfriend.

Another important point is that you should love yourself, just the way you are. That’s what therapy is for.

I take back that last point. Be the change you want to see in your life. Thanks WikiHow! You're empowering!